Band Camp
“Come on Dad, do I really have to go?” I ask as I load my things into the car. “Yes Kevin, how many times do we have to make it clear, you’re going whether you want to or not!!” I climb into the front seat, very unwillingly, I must add. As I disgracefully embark on the journey of a lifetime (of course I didn’t know it at the time) As soon as we leave the house, I am already planning my getaway from the camp. I hadn’t been there before but I had gotten a map of the area. I went over in my head what I had planned as I was packing. “Get out of the cabin; go right onto the path towards the entertainment center; take a right at the first tree before the pool; continue through the woods, going north, and I will end up at the train station. I would hop on the train that would bring me home. Perfect” I thought to myself.
As I was driving to the camp that I would spend the entire summer at, all I could think were 2 things. “Why on earth did my parents send me to band camp?” and “This is going to be the worst summer of my entire life.” First, my parents made me learn how to play the trumpet. “Why?” you might ask? Ill tell you why, so they could send me to this stupid band camp all summer long. Of course, to top it all off, we had to drive 4 hours to get here. “What could be any worse?” I think to myself as I step out of the car. But all thoughts changed when I looked what was standing right before my eyes. Standing in front of me were the two beautiful cabin leaders that would head up my cabin. “Welcome to Foster’s Band Camp, I’m sure you are going have fun.” She said. I could only drool in response.
Sounds like the movie American Pie (which I'm sure you haven't seen since it's rated R) but also has a different voice that is uniquely yours. I like your recent writings in the voice of teen boys. Your pieces on the boarding school student and this piece have a fun and youthful tone to them. Keep working at it!
ReplyDeleteYou had great description J.C. I like the way you planned out the scenery and the setting. You had enough description and detail to keep the story going you also made sure that this story was not too long. I think that later when you have to extent your story for another assignment, you should add what happen in the in camp and give great description like you did with this story. Over all you are the best I have seen so far.
ReplyDeleteJ.C I really how you describe things like how you got in the car and how you responded to the counciler, but just add more ot the story, I wann know more about what happens.
ReplyDelete